Author discovers autism because of an observant reader (part I)

There are moments in your life that are profound and unexpected. There are moments that raise you up and tear you down all at the same moment. As an author I am keenly aware of my characters as they navigate their way through their world. But self-awareness is a tricky thing.

When Monsters of Camp Erehwon was born I was writing for my children. I was writing a message of hope in the face of adversity and the importance of faith and finding your own inner strength. I was also writing from what I knew. I was a misunderstood loner in my youth. I was bullied. I have born the scars of that my whole life, and it has had a massive impact on how I have related to others. To me, my life of challenges looked like everyone else's...

After the release of Ghosts of Camp Erehwon I had sent a copy of my books to a family friend across the country. It wasn't long before she had read, and reread, both books and contacted me. She loved the stories. They captured her imagination. She couldn't put them down. I felt as if I had done what I set out to do by her encouraging words. Then she began to talk about a term I had never been exposed to; neurodivergence. She was absolutely certain that neurodivergent persons would benefit from reading my books. She was convinced that my books could have only been written with a keen knowledge of neurodivergence.

That term came up too many times for my curious mind. I had to look it up. Instantly my PC lit up with thousands of links. Discussion boards. Self-tests. All about autism and ADHD and ADD. I was rather confused. I hadn't written anything that specific. I was simply telling a story. I couldn't be autistic, let alone ADHD. I am a business owner. I am a family man. I do volunteer work in my community. I love being outdoors and studying and reading. My mind had associated autism with a mental image of someone with limited communication skills or a more visible disability. The thought of autism did not sit well with me, for fear that I may have accidentally caused some sort of offense. Or perhaps I was writing something in an insensitive way.

A quick search caused me to scan over a list of signs of autism in undiagnosed adults. That was a moment that hit me like a shockwave. The list contained so many things that belonged to me. Even things that I discarded offhand turned out to be right there. Right in front of me. I didn't have set routines...oh. Oh no. My world has been built of routines my whole life, and if that routine is disrupted recovery was nearly impossible. Sights. Sounds. Smells. Patterns. Stimming. Masking. Anxiety. Fear. Social disconnection. Shutdowns. There it was, my life experiences, laid out as a list in front of me, and I suddenly felt like I was not me.

(To Be Continued...)